I Am Raising a Girl Who Practices Two Religions

I grew up in a Born Again Christian family. My mama said that I was two years old when she and our papa started attending a Born Again Christian church in Quezon City. Inevitably, in most Christian families, we went to church together every Sunday. It was where I first learned how to dance. I also memorized some parts of the Holy Bible because of Sunday School. I love being a Christian and I am proud to be one. 

So when I posted this last night, I got a few private messages about it. 

Why does it sound so easy for you? Aren't you afraid she'll choose to be a Catholic in the future? How come a Born Again Christian mom found it adorable when her daughter looked for a purple rosary? 

I'd like to make it simple but please allow me to share with you this story.

The Underacting Parenting

In my Moved Up, Moved Out post, I told the main reason why R and I decided to put Sophia to where she is studying now. It has been almost a month since she started her new school year and the changes in her young and innocent life were truly evident. So how is she doing? Has it also affected me as a parent?

Aside from how she easily wakes up at 4:30 in the morning to how she fixes herself on her own in a breeze, I can't help but think that my girl won't need me eventually. You see, I don't bring her to school anymore; she takes the school bus along with 15 other girls. She also follows this after-school to-do list to help her remain focused the entire school week. Raising my only girl almost single-handedly is not an easy feat. In fact, I just had my most agonizing week the past two weeks as a parent. We were doing fine but I can't help not to worry; she's obviously having a hard time with all the adjustments. She needs routine but she's an artist, who needs to do things on her pace. So there were days when I have nothing for her but commands in high-pitched voice. I hated myself. I don't like to be that kind of mom; that's not how I want her to see me.

We fought and argued but managed to end it peacefully. After apologies and promises, I asked her what she feels whenever I get mad. In her matured but sweet tone, she said, "I get hurt. And sometimes when I get hurt, I'm thinking if I were like other kids, would you still be mad at me?" *pausing now to wipe my tears* The lump in my throat that balled while she was talking had finally burst into a heavy-on-the-verge-of-ugly-crying sigh. I couldn't said a word. I just caressed her soft, black hair and hugged her tight. 

Father's Day Videos

I like that with the advent of social media, Facebook most especially, we can celebrate Fathers' Day with touching videos. Alam mo na, palagi na lang tayong mga mommies ang mas special, mas magaling, mas busy at mas commendable in the parenting department. Here in our humble kingdom, though, it's my husband who gets the royal treatment from our daughter. Eh kasi minsan lang silang magkita. So habang ako ang default niyang basurahan, cook, fashion consultant at entertainer, it is her father who rules her world. Minsan nagseselos ako, hehe. But ang totoo niyan, natutuwa ako because I strongly believe that a girl who has a good relationship with her father will be an amazing woman when she grows up! Kaya ngayon na malapit na ang Fathers' Day, marami na tayong makikitang videos on Facebook that show what real good fatherhood is.

Here are some of what I've watched with my girl.

That Terrifying Mommy Moment

This narrative is lengthy. I hope you are prepared for this. Grab your popcorn if you feel like it. 

It was the day Courageous Caitie passed away when it happened. Almost all the people in my Facebook feed were grieving, mourning and were left inspired by her story. Her parents' loss became other people's source of hope. I thought, God must have given that kind of trial to Caitie's parents because He knows they can handle it gracefully, faithfully.

SOURCE

It was a different story for another mom, though, who tried to keep her poise but failed. She arrived in her daughter's school to pick her up and learned that she was not there. No one knew where she went. It's inevitable for that mom to be worried. In fact, I asked my Facebook friends - What do you think will be your reaction when you find out your kid was not where you left her? 6 out of 7 respondents said they will panic, will feel nervous and jokingly said will do a Sisa scene. 

That mom was me - I panicked, got really nervous, and almost did a Sisa scene.

"Anong klaseng eskwelahan kayo at hindi niyo alam kung nasaan ang estudyante niyo?"

"Pusa nga kapag nawala hinahanap, anak pa kaya?"

"Don't tell me to calm down."

I was a bit aware of my actions that I can still manage to sit and pray but it was one of the moments that I really cannot control my emotions. 

So what really happened?

Learning Through Play with Ogalala World

Three years ago, I decided to send my daughter to a Progressive School. In my judgment as her primary caregiver, I believed that she'd learn more without the concrete structure and routine that most traditional schools offer. Any four-year-old learns best through play. And she did, with flying and sparkling rainbow colors. Now, she'll be a first grader on Monday, in the same school. She can now read a bit, has a good handwriting and is overly excited to learn. "It's fun, 'Nay", that's what she always says. In the deepest corner of my competitive heart, I want her to be on top, I want her to be best in everything. But my mommy heart pounds for something else. I just really want her to have fun and enjoy her daily life as a student. After all, my parenting goal has always been to raise a healthy and happy kid. 

So when Ogalala World invited us to attend a bloggers workshop cum playdate, I nonchalantly said yes. You see, I decided to go to blogging/media events only if it will help me enrich my life as a woman, wife and mom. And my decision was right. 

The Book With No Pictures by B.J. Novak

I've been following a few mom bloggers abroad. And if you are a regular reader of mine, you know that I love this amazing mom from New York City behind Mommy Shorts. Her name is Ilana Wiles. Remember her Evil Baby Glare Off last year? My daughter got in top 6! Anyway, her level of creativity makes me want to be her. As in, when I grow up I want to be Ilana, haha! Of course, I'm kidding. I'm just one of her league of fans. So Ilana posted a photo of this book on her Instagram (kudos to me for finding it amidst her 2,412 posts) and wrote about it on her spectacular site. This fanatic got curious, as always when she posts new stuff. I told myself I'd get one for my girl.

2014 ended just like that and I never got the book for my little bedtime reader. 

Fast forward to one serendipitous day that Amazon put it on a 4-dollar sale. Yay! I thought I can get it and use the remaining money on my PayPal. But then, just before I put it in my cart, I realized the shipping fee will kill my joy eventually. I still didn't give up, though. In the middle of what seemed to be a deep contemplation on how to get one, a message popped on my Facebook. It was from my Florida-based friend who got married this month. She was asking me about the gown as I was one of her secondary sponsors. My friend happened to be my daughter's godmom so I sweet-talked her in buying it for me her godchild. Tee-hee.

Problem solved. 

Selective Sharenting, Please

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I was already a mom when R opened our joint Facebook account. He did it for Farmville. Well, games and our big boys; it's inevitable. Eventually, he opened his own account and I took over the old one. Over the past six years of using it, I regretfully committed cyber sins — I ranted as if I didn't have a friend, spilled out a lot of controversial family issues and shared around a thousand photos of randomness of my little girl. The latter, in all honesty, can cause a dose of eyes rolling from some single humans in my friends' list. In fact, in 2013, The Wall Street Journal coined a term, called sharenting, to emphasize exactly what most parents do in their social media accounts nowadays.

Sharenting is used to describe the overuse of social media by parents who share content based on their children. It is related to the concept of "too much information".

Goodbye, preschool!

I have something to tell you. My system has not fully absorbed the fact yet that was slapped in my face a month ago — my only child is no longer a preschooler. On June, she'll go to class most probably on the 2nd week, along with the rest of the elementary students. Can we say that again? Elementary. 

Sigh. I just can't really make her slow down, eh? 

Easter Egg Painting at Jollibee

So the Easter Sunday happened and unlike most families in my social media accounts, we were (and as of this writing, still are) incomplete. R was at work and it's just Sophia and I, as always. 

Days before that, I was killing time at a Jollibee branch nearby while my girl was at school rehearsing for graduation when one of the crew came to me and told me about the Jollibee Kids Club (JKC) activity for Easter Sunday.

Motherhood in the Time of Amoebiasis

It was in January, a day before my daughter's school's annual field trip, when I rushed her to the hospital. Her tummy ached so crazy, she said that it was as if there were little people sliding through her insides. The toilet were her saving grace and her face looked pallid after 7 sessions at the throne. It alarmed me and I knew it wasn't a simple diarrhea that porridge and banana can cure. After half a day of waiting for fecal and urine samples and a dramatic bloody scene for more laboratory tests, the doctor proclaimed she had Amoebiasis.

I'm sure you have already heard of it but allow me to Google it for you. According to KidsHealth.org, "Amoebiasis is an intestinal illness that's typically transmitted when someone eats or drinks something that's contaminated with a microscopic parasite, which is an amoeba, a single-celled organism. That's how the illness got its name — amoebiasis."

Why the hell would she have that and I didn't? We ate the same food, drank the same water! What went wrong that I did not notice?

Don't Blame Barbie™ for Being Skinny + A Sneak Peek on Barbie Magazine PH's February Ish

Let's have some real parenting talk here first. Shall we? 

I assume that in wherever part of the world you are right now, there are moms who don't like Barbie. I think they are just being cynical; mostly concluding that girls who love pink, wear short skirts and sporting tiaras have shallow understanding of their femininity. These moms make their little women avoid princess stories and glitters and nail polish. In their Facebook wall, you'll see photos and statuses that say how brave, strong and intelligent their baby girls are. There's nothing wrong with that. In fact, it's good that they want their children to see what's beyond the eyes can see. However, because of trying so hard to be outside the norm, they tend to forget to see the beauty that their little girls have. Yes, it's super OK to go on adventures and strive for strength, intellect and courage but I see nothing wrong with having pretty dresses and nail polish and tiaras, too. Don't you just love seeing those babes kick ass and sparkle? 

Rayala Dialogues: She's Growing Up

Yay! I finally got to post a new RD! It's been a long time and I super regret that I didn't spend enough time to write about my little girl's crazy, silly, blog-worthy isms. I now realize that more than sharing it with you all, more than making you relate to those funny moments that make motherhood more special, documenting about it is more for me. It's for me to remember that despite her patience-testing traits, she's generally a happy, kind-hearted girl. 

So here it is.

I was in the kitchen when P came to me, holding her chest and said —

Pia: Nanay, sakit my dibdib ko in school kanina.
Me: (eyes widened, stopped and looked at her) Did you tell Teacher S?!
P: Opo, Teacher S said "oh sige, rest ka muna ha".
Me: What were you doing ba when it happened?
P: Seatwork po.
Me: (almost smiled, trying my best not to laugh) Hmmm. Baka naman sumakit dibdib mo kasi ayaw mo mag-seatwork? Totoo ba yan?
P: Totoo, 'Nay! Hindi ako lying ha! Si Nanay oh, kawawa ako tapos you say that. (and she continued nagging in her playroom)

So I went back to my dirty dishes and snicker. Alright, I have one more.

Pretend Photo Shoot

Today was one of those days I feel so happy being a mom of a girl. Sophia asked me to put "neyk-up" on her. "I want to be like Sarah Geronimo", says my popstar royalty. I said, "really?" Then she sang Sarah's The Glow in her preschool Broadway fashion. Clapping my hands, hiding my mommy kilig, I told her that if she really wants to be a singer, she must skip chocolates and icecream 'cause it can damage her throat and might compromise her voice. My witty kid quickly said, "pretend lang, 'Nay!" Great. So I asked her if she wants to have a pretend photo shoot, too since she already wore a dress and was on full make-up. She was ecstatic! Using my pink Samsung ST66 camera, I directed her to smile like a lady and pose for me. Five minutes after, she said "my cheeks are killing me, I don't want na." Fine. I think we'll do art stuff or bake cookies or watch movies next time. I don't think I'm okay with her doing this anyway. What a diva, haha.

Care to share your weekend activities with your kids that we can also do at home?

The Daughter of a Soldier

Sophia was around three years and something months old when I finally felt that she knew what her father does, why he's away most of the time and why a lot of men call him "sir". 

It was December of 2009 when she first rode the plane and traveled with me and her nanny to the South to spend the holidays with her soldier dad. Unlike today when nails can already be a subject of a beautiful photograph, this momma-in-the-moment forgot to have a photo of her in front of or inside the plane for posterity. Oh well. 

The journey with my then chubby 15-month-old baby girl was a breeze. She slept the whole time, giggled to everyone who said "hi", and when we arrived, her father lovingly held his unica hija. Was the feeling mutual? Did she reciprocate the affection given? She did nothing and said nothing (of course). Ha! Our tiny trooper just smiled showing her 8 (or was it 12?) milk teeth and remained her cute bubbly self the entire vacation. We did not complain. For us, it was more than enough.

Earlier was totally a different scenario, though. 

Moms' Night Out

Alright. I decided to watch the movie because I had a slight meltdown earlier before my daughter's bedtime. I felt like I needed that push, that little soulful encouragement that I am doing this right, this motherhood thing. I'm not going to talk about the meltdown here because it kinda happens regularly and I don't intend to flood my cyber kingdom with so many dilem-moms... that you know what, might scare the single ladies away from family life.

That brings me to the movie. 

#ThankYouBaby, really.

Whenever my little punk princess watches Sofia the First on Disney Junior and Sofia's mom, Queen Miranda's on a scene, she has this amusing habit of comparing me to her. She'd always say, "Nanay, look at Queen Miranda, she's so beautiful... like you!" or "Awww, Queen Miranda is so nice. Can you be nice like her?" Oops. I guess she thinks I'm like Rapunzel's evil pseudo mom in Tangled. Don't you think? That happens only whenever she forgets she's five and will act as if she's a rebellious teenager. So the inevitable tragedy will also happen, the other side of me, a green smashing Avenger will eventually come out. Before you think I haze my child like a sorority neophyte, let me tell you that I love using flowery words when I write. Keep calm and read on.

I ❤ Being a Mom Project at Nazareth Home

When Jen Gana of Wooden Kidikrafts and Jlofied.com told me that she's getting me as one of the mom ambassadors of her project with a women shelter in Quezon City, I didn't think twice about it. In the middle of product reviews, brand events, mom blogging communities and royal stories, I'd like my blog to be an instrument to greater goodness. I actually prayed for it on my birthday video message last year! Remember? So one day, despite my mind too preoccupied with our moving in to a new kingdom, my little girl and I went to Nazareth Home.

I'm proud to have the world's toughest job!

It's almost 5am but I still don't want to sleep yet as I miss blogging and blog-hopping soooo much! I saw this video in Mommy Shorts (if you don't read her, I suggest you to 'cause she's the awesomest!) and it welled my eyes while watching it. It's just so timely that I've been having that urge to go back to the corporate arena because I want to help my husband in our finances, especially now that we're planning to buy a house. Being at home is great than being stuck in traffic, being with the kid 24/7 keeps me sane than having to call home from work almost every freaking hour; but being those means not being of any help with regard to the financial matters of the family. That makes me feel useless at times but after watching this video, I kinda felt like it pat my shoulder for having the world's toughest job. Ever. 

Sniff-sniff... Makes me miss Mama, too. Cheers to us, my fellow hardworking mommas! ♥

By the way single royalties, these are the requirements should you want to apply:

Priorities

I thought I had everything at its proper place and timing. I thought I could attend events of brands and companies that I'm interested in without compromising my daughter's school attendance. I thought I can blog according to my schedule. I thought my 5-year-old will never get sick. I was wrong.

It was Thursday last week when I went to Manila Hotel for a bloggers' tour. Honestly, Sophia was already feverish then that I told her teacher she can't make it to school that day. I still went to the tour because I felt that it was a once-in-a-lifetime experience that I just couldn't let it pass; I might regret it had I not come. We finished the tour a little after sunset. Manila sunset was breathtaking, as usual; at the back of my mind: Is my daughter still breathing?

Drama Mama

"If you don't need me, let me know so I could go back to work!" 

That was what I told my daughter two days ago during my first biggest meltdown of the year. It was past midnight, she was still super active and totally ignoring everything I told her. And the icing on the smashed cake? I was really, really, really tired. Chores and PMS... who wouldn't just wish to rest?