The Field Trip That Never Was

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FYI: This is a long narrative. And this is a personal blog. You'll get bored if you don't care. So don't read. 

Am I being an irresponsible parent? Earlier was LB's first school field trip; and unfortunately, we stayed home. I woke up late; 45 minutes after the assembly time. I never thought my phone's alarm won't work this time. Hey pink C3, I thought we're cool? You just failed me. Of all the days that it would have topak, bakit ngayon pa? Hay. Can't blame the phone though, she's two years old na and weathered storm (hinulog ni LB sa plangganang may nakababad) and bruises (naihulog at hinulog na ni LB ng maraming beses).

When I got the chance to talk to one of the teachers, I felt worse --- the money I paid for the trip was non-refundable. I wanted to puke. I wasted Php 2000 from my husband's hard-earned money! Now I am literally in tears while typing this. And guess where he is right now? Working --- ARMY way --- not in front of the papers inside a comfortable office. I was a mess. I wanted to argue with them that it was not stated in the letter they gave us, but my mind went blank already. I still wanted to go, that was what I cared about. LB was still blissfully sleeping when I was talking to her teacher. She only woke up due to loud sobs from a distressed woman beside her.

I texted the people I needed to talk to, moms who could relate: my sister N (with two school-aged boys), new-found mommy friend M and fellow army wife (now close friend) EM. N told me to still go, perhaps on the 2nd location; but I really felt miserable already and it's a big production number to commute from Marikina to Laguna --- in my state of mind. Another thing, that's another gastos. Better late than never? I don't effin' care about what others would say, I don't have the oomph to go anymore. I am not really a strong woman, you think? I don't know. M, on the other hand, was a devil's advocate; but I love how she deals with my mommy woes whenever we talk --- practical and no-nonsense. She told me that my trip fee should have been refunded. She has a 5-year-old boy who goes to a different school in Marikina City, so she basically knows those rules. Sigh. But according to her teacher, the organizer (I thought they were the organizer) said the collected money were already given to the respective locations. Kahit 25% lang ng total amount, hindi pwede eh hindi ko naman nagamit yung EK tickets namin? What if it was an emergency and not a lame excuse such as mine? Oh well, suffer the consequences and sulk in sorrow, mother! You're late and that's unforgivable. Boo. Then just like what I needed, EM empathized. Sad daw talaga and she felt guilty that we slept late 'cause we were still texting last night. I said it was not that. Kahit one hour lang tulog ko, basta nakapag-alarm ako, nagigising ako. The Baguio trip proved that: I woke up at 330ish in the morning because we needed to leave by 4. Iba lang yung dati na nagpa-rebook kami ng flight from CDO kasi late ako nagising (2007 and 2010, separate incidents). Hehe. Uy ha, hindi din naman nagising si Rhambo.

Monster pimple = stress

But despite that the cake was scattered all over the floor already, I can still eat the icing on the box --- LB was not unhappy. In fact, it looked like she doesn't care a bit. Hindi pa siguro ganun ka-aware what this day's supposed to be. So pang-alis guilt ko, I let her eat the baon na chips for breakfast! At kahit ang aga-aga pa, pinapanood ko na ng dvds niya. Don't roll your eyes, please. I really felt awful.

Now I am a bit sober and sour-graping; my argument with myself is that we could always go to Laguna naman, with Rhambo pa. But the feeling of going to a school field trip with her classmates --- that we can't give LB. There's still next year though, hindi na ako matutulog! Or tatlo na alarm ko para sigurado. Sana lang hindi na maalala ni LB itong yugto na 'to pagtanda niya. Ayokong maalala niya na ang shonga ng nanay niya. Pak.

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What just gives me a slight pang in the heart until now is the fact that I wasted Php 2000 for nothing! A few days earlier, I have a gut feeling not to go anymore. Enchanted Kingdom kasi yung main venue ng trip; 12nn-6pm. In my opinion, it is very inappropriate for a preschooler and the younger kids. For Grades 4 and up, okay pa siguro. Kasi 'di ba we paid for a ride-all-you-can ticket but she CAN'T ride all naman. Me too, kasi I need to look after her. And I'm scared. Haha. I have set aside a budget for the games since M told me last Tuesday that playing in the games booth has a separate fee. But I still don't feel like it's going to be fun for both of  us. I wanted sana to bring her there (dahil hindi pa din kami nakapag-EK ni Rhambo) when she's old enough to go to at least 5 rides. Meaning, she has to be at least 4 feet. Para sulit ang bayad and we all enjoyed it pa. I hoped there was a separate package for the preschoolers, tailor-fit for their age and abilities. Excuse my sour-grapingness, every single cent matters in a single-income family like ours. I'm sure someone will say "single cent matters pala, eh ba't ka na-late nagising?!" Sagot ko naman, anong paki mo teh? Hindi nga nag-alarm phone ko. Ikaw nagtatrabaho para sa'min? I-blog mo yang rant mo! Haha. #paranoidlang

Next time, I should trust my instinct. My instinct told me not to go na eh, pinilit ko pa. Sana pinangpakabit ko na lang ng cable yung pera --- same amount! Malamang mabaliw-baliw na naman sa Nick Jr., Disney Jr. at Cartoon Network 'tong isa. BUT. The letter said it's a school requirement (but they didn't say na non-refundable ang ibabayad, haha ang kulit ko). Sigh again. Ay siya, makakamove on din ako. Wait, galawin ko na kaya 'tong Jack Daniels ng asawa ko para makalimot? :p 

But wait mudrabelles, do you think Enchanted Kingdom is age-appropriate for preschoolers? Enlighten me.