Never Knew I'd Be a Mom of Two

For the sake of my new readers (hi guys), here’s a little background. I have always been a working mom. I only stopped for reals when Sophia had a pneumonia in 2012. Then after five years of trying my hand at being a work-at-home mompreneur, I went back to the corporate arena as a Marketing Manager of an iconic clothing brand. Despite the difficulties of commuting, dreadful office building and uncooperative superiors, I enjoyed every single minute of doing my job.

However, here’s a major plot twist. I got pregnant again a month later I got hired.

My child is a picky eater! What can I do?

Ever since I shared stories of my love for food and motherhood, the usual question I get from first-time parents would be how to make their children have an awesome appetite like mine. First, I always tell them that there's no cookie-cutter formula to having a pickytarian-free home, as each child is different. But yes, there are many doable and foolproof ways even the moms before us have done to make eating time fun and filling for the whole family.

OK. Before we start, please know that this is just a phase. In fact, my eldest Sophia only ate a few dishes when she was a “threenager.” It was a struggle for me because she only liked soupy corned beef, chicken nuggets, adobo, and scrambled eggs just to name a few. During that time, I felt like the worst mom ever. But I knew I had to do something. I knew that if I'd just wallow in self-pity and self-blame, nothing's going to change my daughter's picky eating habits.

4 Simple Bonding Activities for Siblings with Big Age Gap

When people knew I was pregnant with my second child, most of them were a bit surprised to find out the 9-year age gap between her and my eldest, Sophia. Some even insinuated that close in ages is better; saying that the kids will be instant buddies and that they actually worry if my girls will ever understand each other. Well, guess what? Their age gap is actually a huge blessing!

I mean, it seems as if our Sammybear has a second mom in her Ate Sophia. I think my firstborn prepared for it really well. She was 6 years old when she started praying specifically for a baby sister so when our little boss arrived, she started taking her job as a big sister seriously.

Life Lately: Do you have someone who believes in you?

Few days ago, I fought real hard against sadness brought by envy.

As a blogger, may mga gusto akong ma-achieve na unfortunately, hindi ko nakukuha. Siyempre, diyan na ako magsisimulang mag-doubt sa kakayahan ko. Am I not good enough? Do I really have what it takes to be the next top model este to be an influencer? I even questioned myself once if my posts are still relevant. Pakiramdam ko, wala na akong bagong maihahain sa mga readers and followers ko.

But guys, may nabasa ako. Daig daw ng consistent ang magaling. Mahabang usapin yan, pwedeng topic for debate, pero pinanghawakan ko yan ng bongga. I spoke to the little girl inside me and said, “tie your hair tight and neat, marami pa tayong gagawin.” So kahit napaka-steady bordering to boring na ng #BaonSerye posts ko, tuloy lang ang daily hanash ng momshie niyo. Sa baon-making stories niyo ako nakilala at sinubaybayan eh, kaya hindi ko ito basta-basta bibitawan.

To further leave the puddle of toxicity that I created, I did my best to shift my mental gears. I strongly believe that clarity fosters calmness.

Pork Ribs Caldereta

Caldereta is one of my favorite dishes ever! If a Filipino kiddie party will never be complete without sweet spaghetti, I think any Pinoy handaan (basta mahanapan ng something to celebrate for) will not be as special without a tomato-based meat dish. Afritada, menudo, mechado, caldereta—whichever way you like it—at least one of them is surely ever present. When I was a kid, I always looked forward to having menudo with pancit bihon. But as I grew older, my food choices have changed. I'd have caldereta any other day. Its thick and savory sauce plus the non-complex number of ingredients make it so enjoyable to devour.

I read (or have watched) somewhere that caldereta originally has goat meat but I guess, our ancestors have actually taken it from beef bourguignon of the French that we also started using beef. For a lot of Filipino families though who'd like to eat caldereta on a regular day, beef can be a bit expensive for everyday cooking. Good thing a more affordable and very versatile meat has entered the picture—pork. Of course, there's nothing like beef caldereta but if you're on a budget and craving for this Pinoy handaan staple, this recipe that uses pork ribs is a great alternative! 

Salmon Teriyaki

Do you know that salmon is a stress-busting superfood? I didn't know that, too and actually can't confirm if it's true. I just read that somewhere and thought it can be quite a cool opening sentence to this recipe post lol. Kidding aside, fact or fake, eating salmon really does bust stress away! At least for us, my husband and I, who love the fish down to its pink meat. So when I knew that Seaking, a brand I love buying at the supermarket, now has wild-caught Alaskan salmon, I got excited for my salmon-loving better half. 

You see, Seaking's salmon cuts are not farmed so they don't feed from chemically-enriched fish food. It's clean, fresh-smelling and so convenient to use! It comes in three cuts – slab, steak and chunks. It's a life-saver, I tell you. Allow me to share with you this latest recipe that I've tried doing and had been successful at for the first time!

11 Things Sophia Said

My firstborn is quite a chatter. I really wonder where she got it from! Haha, fine, my genes must have something to do with it. In fact, when she was a baby, not even turning a year old yet, she can copy whatever I or her father say. It was the cutest! But now that she's a pre-teen who actually has a reaction to anything that's happening around her, it can be pretty annoying. So yeah, cute isn't exactly a good word to describe it.

But of course, it also means that her responses can be funny just like when she started talking non-stop. And for her 11th birthday, here are 11 memorable things Sophia said.

35 today

Well, well, well. What do we have here?

But first, lemme take a selfie.

When I was 10 years old, I looked at people my age now like they're so old. Like when they don't have their own house, don't drive their own car and have zero career, I thought that they are failures. The younger me even swore to never wash my own laundry! I said I'd have maids to do the house chores. I said I'd be wearing stilettos to work. I said my future children would have their own bedrooms at my house with a beautiful garden. Such dreams I had as a child. God bless every kid who dreams like I did. 'Cause guess what? None of those came true.

My Formula to Be a Zero Worries Parent

I have two daughters, Sophia and Samantha. They have a 9-year age gap. People are always amused when they learn about that miniscule fact about my kids. Comments about how difficult it's going to be when they become adults are inevitable but is it really necessary to point that out?  I mean, isn't parenting a tough task in general no matter what gender and age gap our children have? I don't think there's a cookie-cutter way to follow, you know. I believe, though that there's no harm in doing what those ahead of us have done already especially if they actually succeeded. Well, this is a huge topic that a single blog post won't do justice but as a mom for more than a decade, please allow me to share with you a few things on how my husband and I raise our girls with zero worries.

My best ever life is to joyfully spend it with these two. ♥

Okay, before you judge me for being so internet-fake with the zero worries phrase, I hope it's clear with you that it's figurative. It's not possible to raise a child with zero worries! Moms worry all the time, I worry all the time. Anxiety is synonymous to my name. In fact, there are times when I can't even sleep at night thinking about my girls' future - career, first boyfriend and will they ever learn their way in the kitchen like I do? See how I worry for them 20 years ahead? I can be a worry freak, I tell ya. But worry begets wrinkles and palpitations, which I strongly avoid at any cost. So as the primary parent of our offsprings, I created a formula to actually make the impossible hopefully possible. The results cannot be seen and enjoyed yet but I'm holding on to my goal because I got a great God who got my back.

Would you like to know the formula? It's quite simple. Basically, a kid must have these three in order for a parent to have zero worries:

The original #BaonSerye is back!

My pre-teen Sophia is now on 5th grade. I think her level of appetite for her age, built and height is just right. I mean, standing at 5 feet tall with an effervescent personality, she literally gets hungry every hour. So now that she's back to regular school (read: homeschooled for a year, will tell the story why we quit soon), which we all welcomed with warm, excited hearts, it means this mama is back to her baon-making game again! If you're not familiar with how I make my kid's lunches, you might want to read this lovely feature about me by theAsianparent Philippines entitled, Meet the Foodie Mom Behind the Popular #baonserye. 

For two school years, I prepped Sophia's meals with lots of love, cute bento tools and wide array of snacks. Nothing much has changed this school year. I'm just gradually minimizing the cute factor in each baon since she doesn't really mind how her food looks lately. Again, something from her tummy sends message to her brain that cuteness can't make it full, anyway. She has days that she appreciates that her baon looks like it's straight from an Instagram feed (like today's pancake, chocolate syrup and fruit crisps combo) but generally, she's totally fine with whatever I serve her as long as it's healthy and filling. I'd like to believe that I'm a cool mom so I try my best to include fun in everything I do for my children. This was one of the major reasons why I created #baonserye in 2016.

What Parents of Toddlers Should Know About Walking

When Sammy has started sitting on her own, everyone was excited to see her walk already... And now that she has perfectly mastered her strides, who's following her, pacing with her all the time? It's not everyone, it's just me! Where are they now? Oh, they're chilling on the side, laughing and saying how cute she is. Haha! Well, if not for the summer heat, I wouldn't complain as I felt like I lost a lot of weight by doing so. But then again, the weather just makes me want to scoop her up and carry her as long as my back can handle. 

Don't get me wrong, mamas. I would love my terrific toddler to have as much freedom as she deserves but let's be real, running after a toddler isn't easy. It requires many underrated traits and character that parents and caregivers should embody. Would you like to know some? I got a few basics here.

How We Make Our Marriage Happy

At 23, I was every inch of what I wanted myself to be — a fun and free college graduate who was working in the biggest broadcasting network in the country. Also, I had a cute military boyfriend who loved me back as much I loved him. I wasn't rich but I had everything I needed to be happy. For me then, my life was perfect. Things have changed dramatically, though when I got pregnant out of wedlock. Sadly, the boyfriend (who became no longer cute for me lol) and I had opposing views about the situation; it was expected that we didn't get married. Worse, I didn't have a job for the whole 9 months of carrying my little human. Just imagine how miserable I felt every time I craved a burger and I don't even have money to buy the cheapest kind.

While my mother took me under her care, I knew I had to do something for me and my baby. So during my first trimester, armed with resourcefulness and guidance from the Lord, I sold my huge magazine collection to a magazine store near our house. My collection of mostly Summit Media magazines was really that huge that I was able to buy myself fruits, maternity house dress and vitamin supplements. And just before my first trimester ended, my boyfriend (who became cute again lol) and I reconciled and decided to become partners in building our dream team. We knew we would never have our fun and free youth back but having a baby gave our lives so much meaning.

Fish Escabeche

I may look like I know a lot about food but guys, I am just actually learning so much from the people I follow on Instagram! Take for example, Joey of @chichajo. I was watching her Stories when I saw the tagged online shop that sells seafood. Wow. I mean, who would think that you can now buy fresh seafood online, right? Search it, it's called @marvsboqueria.ph. You're welcome. Marvs sells different kinds of seafood! He also has an awesome package that includes prime beef steak, tiger prawns and salmon. It's quite costly; I'm still saving up for that so I can cook them on my birthday. Or maybe on our wedding anniversary. 

Anyway, I bought crab meat, tanigue fillet and steak and bakoko. I never encountered bakoko in the wet market so after I did a quick consultation with Mr. G, I decided to buy that. If you are following me on IG, you'd know that I made a lot of dishes using the 500-gram crab meat. With tanigue, I made kilawin from some of it for my husband. As for my new fishy friends, I made escabeche.

Chicken and Pork Adobo

Is there any meat-loving mammal here who don't eat adobo? If that's you, why are you even here? 

I mean, remember the time celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay chose pork adobo burger over a bison and chorizo double stacked burger in the American TV program Good Morning America? What about when Anthony Bourdain learned how to cook adobo? I won't go further and stress the importance of these two gentlemen in the food industry but if they loved adobo, why anyone else wouldn't?

When I became a full-time homemaker, adobo has always been my saving grace. Adobo gave comfort to my husband after a tiring and long travel from the camp. Its thick and flavorful sauce has been my eldest daughter's first experience in appreciating Filipino cuisine. A huge chunk in our family and food stories will always be taken by adobo. 

Bistek Tagalog

If there's one thing that I can't just easily minimize the consumption of, it has to be beef! I'm a beef-lover since I learned how glorious bulalo is. Then as I grew older, I have always loved my mama's beef caldereta. Its savory sauce made of rich tomato paste, pork liver and some chili was a perfect match to the beef's taste and texture. And one day, after a long and tiring trip along EDSA, my husband and I found ourselves parking in front of a beef pares joint near our house. Yes, instead of going home directly, we stopped by to eat pares—our ultimate post-carmageddon meal. But that's not the recipe I'm sharing here today. Sorry for the confusion, haha.

I got carried away with my beef stories that I went that far. It happened that my husband came home with a big bag of white onions from their farmer friends. The ones we got were actually market rejects. It was still perfectly edible but they came in odd sizes so it's not good to sell anymore. And since white onions rot fast, I needed to consume it before it does. Bistek Tagalog enters the picture. 

Vegetable and Macaroni Soup with Crispy Bacon Bits

My toddler Samantha is such a joy to feed! She now eats table food and almost everything that I serve to her big sister, Sophia so that means kitchen time is back to easy for me. I no longer make separate food for the tiny one. No more boiling and mashing and storing. My baby foodie now eats freshly-cooked food. Thank God for daughters who love eating as much as I love cooking! It's not always a walk in the park, though. There are days when one of them, or sometimes both, feel like being judgy as if I'd feed them something gross. Well, I've made myself a general rule when it comes to my relationship with food and motherhood—while I enjoy seeing my kids finish their plant-based meals, I still acknowledge the fact that they are humans who deserve to enjoy 'delish dishes'. 

What I mean by delish dishes are food our generation has always loved when we were kids (uhm till now actually). Like spaghetti, burger, fried chicken, pizza, and what-have-yous. Back then, it's every child's dream to eat those on a regular basis. Jollibee was like the god of happiness in the 90s! But not me. As a kid, I was happier to have nilagang baka, pancit and chicken macaroni soup. In fact, I knew my mama, who's a widow, has extra money when she makes us creamy and hearty macaroni soup. She paired it with fried fish or breaded pork chops. It was one of the best memories of my childhood... watching my mother cook for us. Her version of macaroni soup has julienned carrots, shredded cabbage, chicken pieces and sliced hotdogs. I loved my mama's soup but now that I'm a grown-up and have learned the risks of eating hotdogs regularly, I have almost taken that out of our grocery list. Also, pink soups mean there's food color. But guys, this recipe still has processed meat. Why? Duh, bacon!

Sweet and Sour Meatballs

Just like how special bulalo is to me because it brings many memories of my father, this dish is also close to my heart. You see, my mama had a canteen near a college school in Quezon City when I was around Sophia's age. During those times, I learned about a lot of different dishes that we don't usually eat at home. And one of them is Sweet and Sour Meatballs! Yes, would you believe that she didn't serve it to us then that I needed to hang out in her canteen to know what it is? Haha, I'm sure she'd roll her eyes dramatically and might say I just can't remember it. Well, please remind me to ask my older sisters to clarify.

Anyway, so in the canteen, she served this dish with big, juicy meatballs and with thick red sauce unlike most cheap eateries where sauce was too orange and balls were small and full of flour. Too sad that she had to close the canteen. I saw how successful it was! I loved hanging out there and helping her with whatever. Many students liked it there, too because of the delicious and generous serving of food (and also, maybe because my eldest sister was an attractive teenager, lol).

Almondigas

Feeding a growing toddler may be quite tricky given their food limitations and experience. But once you get into the groove in knowing what your kid likes most and what she can eat, serving her nutritious and delicious food can be your second nature. I have three simple tips to achieve that! First, it has to be soft or soupy. Nothing that can choke them or can make their milkteeth hard to chew. Next, it should be a complete meal—think of go, grow glow. Toddlers have unlimited energy and they need well-balanced meals to refuel. Lastly and most importantly, it has to be irresistibly yummy.

Misua con Patola or Almondigas easily tops the list of dishes that we can serve our toddler and the whole family. It's a legit hit especially when it's breezy cool like today. For those who don't know yet, Almondigas came from the Spanish word Albondigas, which means meatballs. So yes, this soup is meatballs-based but loved well if it has patola and misua. There are more savory versions from other countries but here in the Philippines, Almondigas is known to be light and comforting; perfect for sweater weather or when someone's down with a flu.

Love My Party-Ready Look by Maja Blanka Makeup Artistry

Ten years ago, on Sophia's first birthday party, I only had powder and lipstick on. I know I'm more kikay than most women my age but I was really clueless about makeup. Worse, my hair was tied in a tight ponytail. And to make the look more loshang, I wore a headband with it, haha! It was very humid that day, okay. Mother Nature was having her PMS 'cause six days after the party, Ondoy happened. But I told myself that it's not going to happen again on Samantha's first birthday party.

I'm so happy to have hit that vain goal of mine! I may have unwanted fats here and there but at least, I looked polished in each and every photo, candid or not. Beauty isn't a priority for some moms but I hope this post will make you change your mind. I mean, look at the huge difference!

Filipino 90s Party for Samantha's First Birthday

We never do real time here on my blog, I bet you already know that. So I'm sure you understand why I am only sharing this now when it actually happened a month ago. Okay, before you start saying, "But one-year-olds don't actually know that it's their birthday!", I have said in my welcome speech in the party that we did this for us and the guests and not solely for Sam. And because it was for us, my husband R and I thought of a theme that will be an instant hit to our crowd. We only invited family and close friends. I only had one from college, R had four from the military and the rest are our families. We knew that they will appreciate Filipino 90s theme.

It was around first quarter of last year when we planned out how it was going to be—a party like when we were kids. What was it then? Well, nothing fancy schmancy. The only difference was it wasn't held in a garage but in an events place called Sweet Madie's.

One Word, One Year: 2019

After a week and so of trying to balance homeschooling, taking care of a toddler and managing the household while being down with flu, I realized how my one word last year still has its effect on me. Well, it doesn't really apply to my general mood (malalaos ang mga nagro-road rage sa akin haha) but it was when I'm calm that Sophia better understands a Math problem, Sammy loves it when I'm calm and being calm is the best way to keep a hardworking helper. So yes, choosing a word to work on your life definitely gives good results. Hence, still doing it this year.

I've been choosing one word every new year for five years already, except in 2015 when my goal then was to rebrand (from a hot pink Bebengisms to a quieter, cleaner Royal Domesticity) and my process has never changed. I still pray before I finally decide on what to put here. One Word, One Year may just be a blogging trend but for me, it's all spiritual. I always seek for what the Lord sees in my heart. I got stuck for a few days thinking of what word to choose but after I prayed, I knew what it's going to be. 

In 2014, I chose faith.

In 2016, I chose purpose.

In 2017, I chose humility.

In 2018, I chose calm.

And for 2019, I choose GRATITUDE.

Moving Forward

Well, well, well. What do we have here? In the past three years, my first post of every new year was all about looking back the past year. It's not entirely a bad thing but this year, I decided to celebrate our now and maybe get more excited for the days to come. So...

This is TMI but my girls and I haven't taken a bath yet and the sink's still full of dirty dishes from our brunch earlier. Also, as of this writing, our househelp hasn't come home yet from her New Year's leave. I'm kind of expecting the worst already; I just don't want to wash the dishes yet. After all the festivities, from four Christmas parties in the camp to cooking two batches of seafood paella and lechon belly here at home, my skin and bones are yearning for this blog. Like I said in a previous post, I will be blogging for me. So dirty plates, you can wait.

Took this photo inside the camp using my husband's office camera.

Upon checking the Blogger dashboard, there are posts saved on my drafts from 2012, the year I started blogging mainstream (I had an online journal no one has ever read), that I still haven't published till now. Yes, 7 years later, it's still there. What happened, you ask? Simple—procrastination. That giant evil blob of a word has led me to many of my failures, blogging and life in general. It's tough to avoid it but this year, I am seriously hoping to never invite it to my parties. Hence, typing away now like a hired thesis typist. 

I have a few solid plans for this lovely space but basically, I just want you all to know that you'd be reading a lot of my ruminations from now on. As in, like writing in my LiveJournal in 2003! I enjoy sharing hacks, tips and new products for families to try but writing my random ramblings is what I love doing the most here. Kinda sounds selfish, I know but that's my truth. I wish you won't get tired of reading it, though. 

OK. My allotted minutes for the blog are over! I can hear the girls' laughter from the room, don't want to miss the fun. Next post will be about grocery shopping then my one word for 2019. Laters! ♥